Day 1, June 30: Riverdale

The girls slept well last night -- not a peep from when we turned off the light at 1 a.m. (!!) until they came into our room at 8. We explored Riverdale some today. The girls just loved trying on their new clothes -- had a bit of a "chancla" (flip-flop) mishap in that the ones I bought for them turned out to be quite uncomfortable and while they didn't want to say so, we cut our morning walk short -- just went and saw the pool and the library, where we got a few Sesame Street ESL DVDs for kids. The hats from Patricia and Jim were a big hit:

The slinkys (thank you Gosas!) were a lot of fun -- we spent some time on the stairs practicing our skills:

And, of course, we had to go to the pool! Fernanda just loves the water. Wendy is a bit more nervous and preferred to spend her time wading in the kiddy pool or sitting on the side of the big pool splashing herself with the box the floaties came in:

We also went over to Capipets and picked up Happy and Lucky (thank you Magali and Vivian for taking care of them last night) -- Fernanda and Wendy were both excited and happy to meet them. Vivian and Magali were lovely with the girls and hopefully we will visit again very soon.

After picking up the dogs we went for a short walk in the woods by the river, then came home because both girls seemed pretty tired. They did some reading and drawing before dinner, and then after we ate we had a relaxing evening with an ESL video, more drawing and reading, and then a card game before bed.

It was a really good first day. The girls seem to be enjoying themselves and are very affectionate and comfortable with us. They both have great senses of humor in different ways and we look forward getting to know them more and more. Onward to Day 2!

First Night Pics: airport & at home :)

Airport/Home!

It was of course a nervous day -- exciting too. We had lots to do -- make up beds, get the backpacks ready, of course I managed to be on knitting deadline as usual for the Colombian "ositos" (teddy bears), food shopping (more food shopping!), etc.

We got out to JFK at about 9:00, 45 minutes before the scheduled meeting time. Robbin and Carolyn were there -- two of the other host parents. We hung around together for awhile and then the Kidsave rep arrived along with other host families and we all waited together. The flight didn't land until 10:25, and they didn't come out through the arrival gate until about an hour later. But then there they were -- a little group of 8 children and their chaperone, wearing Kidsave shirts. We approached the group, found Fernanda and Wendy, and started talking to them in Spanish. Wendy had a big smile, Fernanda seemed much more shy. We showed them their backpacks and the pinwheels, which they liked playing with. After a few minutes, Fernanda said "sueno" (tired), so we asked them if they were ready to leave and they said yes. On the way to the car they asked us a few questions about the dogs and pool, so it seems they did see the letter and picture we had sent.

We got in the car and drove home -- both fell asleep on the way. It was after midnight by this point. When we parked the car they both woke up and seemed to have gotten a second wind. They were both talkative and happy, very impressed by the building and the elevator. When we got inside the apartment and showed them their room they seemed so thrilled. They loved the clothes and the dolls and especially the coloring binders -- in fact they both wanted to sit right down and color, which they did.

After about ten minutes of coloring, it was time to get ready for bed. Much talk of finding pajamas and toothbrushes, where to put dirty clothes, getting the bears and dolls ready to sleep with them, brushing teeth. We said the Our Father and Hail Mary with them in Spanish (which they already knew by heart), kissed them goodnight, and not a peep since.

We're both really pleased with how it all went -- they seemed to get comfortable quickly and both are so sweet. We're excited for tomorrow! Plans include pool time, walking around Riverdale and meeting the dogs. :)

For some reason the pics won't post, so I'll try again tomorrow.

FAQs #1-3

FAQ #1: Are you going to adopt them?

We hope so, but we want to experience the 5 weeks with them first to be sure it is the right thing for them and for us. In any case, we aren't able to make any kind of final commitment until after the hosting program is over and they return to Colombia. Because I've read so many stories on the internet about delays in the process, we decided to get as much paperwork done as we could ahead of time, so that if we do decide to adopt, we are ready to roll soon after they leave.

As Kidsave host parents, we're committed to advocating for the children as well as discerning whether adopting them will be right for us. The hope is that when they return to Colombia, there are at least two families interested in adopting them. That way, if anything goes wrong, there is a backup in place. As the host parents, we have the right of first refusal, so we will definitely be able to apply to adopt them if that is what we decide.

We know many of you will be interested in how the discernment process is going, but we are hoping to be able to experience the 5 weeks without lots of discussion throughout about long-term plans. We will definitely let everyone know when we come to a decision or if we have anything to share, but we would ask you not to ask us about our thoughts on whether we will adopt, especially not in front of the children (see below). We are very grateful for your understanding of this request -- we know it's a somewhat strange dynamic!

FAQ #2: Do the children know they are here to find an adoptive family?

This is a very awkward issue. They apparently do know, but we are not allowed to discuss it with them (which I completely agree with, more on that below). The Summer Miracles program is in its fourth year in Colombia, so many of the children have probably seen other kids from their orphanage come to the U.S. for the summer, return home, and then an American family arrive some time later and adopt them. Fernanda actually participated in Summer Miracles last summer, so she likely has even more awareness than other kids might of the purpose of the program. As far as talking with the children about adoption, we are strongly advised against doing so because if anything were to go wrong, the heartbreak would be devastating. Apparently in the past there have been Kidsave host families who have discussed adoption with their host child because they were certain about their decision, but then after the child returned home, something unexpected came up and they were unable to proceed. It was extremely traumatic for all but especially for the child. So (this probably does not need to be said), please do not talk about adoption with the children. It is the elephant in the room, but for their best interests, we all need to pretend it is not there. We really thank everyone for their sensitivity and understanding of this.

FAQ #3: What happened to their parents? or, Why are they in an orphanage?

We have limited information about the specifics of the children's history, knowing only that their mother passed away and their father was then unable to care for them. If we proceed with adopting, we will learn more. However, this is obviously very personal information, which really belongs to the children and not to us. Even when we know more ourselves, we will likely not have much more to say. Once more, we really appreciate your sensitivity and understanding.

More Prep

This morning I started organizing the backpacks that we will take to them as welcome presents at the airport. Each backpack will have a teddy bear that I knitted in the colors of the Colombian flag, some playing cards, and a little Hello Kitty pack of pens, notebook and an activity book. Also a bottled water and a snack as they will probably be thirsty/hungry after a long flight.

I also worked on their photo albums -- one of the projects for this summer is to make photo albums of our time together so the children can take them back to Colombia as keepsakes and as a way of processing the experience. The ones I bought have room for 200 photos (!!) so partly to take up some space but more because I thought it would help them acclimate, I decided to start off the albums with pictures of family and friends whom they will meet this summer. If you looked at our wall calendar you saw that we have lots of events planned! I'm hoping that the albums will be a way to familiarize them with the people in our lives who are eager to meet them.

Still needed: those floaty armbands for the pool, a rug for their room, and after this month of end-of-school-disorganization, groceries. We'll take care of all that this weekend.

3 more days!!! :) :)

Room/Calendar Pics

These are some pictures of Fernanda and Wendy's room in Riverdale. Friends and family have been extremely generous with gifts and hand-me-downs (thank you all!), some of which we actually had to put away for later, on advice that the girls may be overwhelmed by too much at first.

And, the wall calendar! Yes, I'm a Lankenau. Or is it a Lanckton? :)

Getting Ready

We've been preparing for this for almost a year, and it's hard to believe Fernanda and Wendy will be here in exactly 6 days! As I type this, it's 10:00 p.m., the time their plane will land at JFK next Monday night. Their room is ready (pictures to come), we've got a color-coded calendar up in the kitchen detailing all the plans (2 weeks of art camp, days at KIPP, family events, plans with friends, Kidsave weekend activities), we have games, toys, books in Spanish and English . . . now it's just time to wait. Oh, and finish up everything we can for our adoption dossier. I have an appointment on Thursday to go through all the paperwork we have gathered so far, and Saturday we go for fingerprints for our immigration clearance. Once the girls come, we have to put all that on hold, so I'm glad we've gotten as much done as we can.

I'm going to post our experiences to this blog both so we have a record and so anyone who is interested can follow along. We're expecting some miracles this summer!